Religious trauma refers to the psychological and emotional harm caused by experiences related to organized religion or spiritual beliefs. Religious trauma is a complex and often misunderstood issue that affects many individuals who have experienced distressing or harmful situations within religious contexts. Religious trauma can be difficult to confront as individuals are realizing that the community that was supposed to feel safe and supportive may actually have been harmful. Processing religious trauma can bring up strong emotions. It is important that, as you begin your journey, you are in a safe environment and have a support system, such as a mental health professional or support group. You are not alone in this journey! The trauma you experienced is real and you deserve to feel heard and understood.

 

The Impact of Religious Trauma

The effects of religious trauma can be far-reaching, influencing one’s mental health, relationships, and overall well-being. Individuals may find themselves:

 

1) Struggling with Self-identity

Many religious trauma survivors struggle with self-identity as they have been told how they should act and what they should believe by their religion. It is normal to experience some identity confusion as you are realizing that what you believe doesn’t match what you were taught. Reframing this as an opportunity to be whoever you want to be may help in developing your new set of core beliefs and values. This is a time for you to be curious about yourself!

 

2) Rigid Thinking

Some religious trauma survivors adopt a “black or white” way of thinking or a strong moral code of what is “right or wrong”. This is normal! You may find safety in absolutes as there is less unknown. You also may have found that your religion had a very strict way of thinking, labeling certain behaviors, professions or life choices as “worthy” or “unworthy” or “good” or “bad”. In a safe environment with a therapist or someone you trust, practice living in the gray area. Notice what it feels like to exist in the space of possibility. What does it feel like to turn the “or” into an “and”?

 

3) Difficulty Making Decisions

If you find yourself living in the “black or white” it can be difficult to make decisions after leaving a religion. If you were brought up in a religion that made the decisions for you and constructed a clear path for your life, the idea of choice can be daunting. Many religions construct a strict moral code and set of standards to discourage critical thinking. Once you start to discover your own beliefs, values and identity outside of religion you may find that there is much freedom in choice. The only person that can make decisions for your life is you!

 

4) Fear of Making Mistakes

We know that we are all human and we make mistakes, but when you are living in a religious environment there can be intense pressure for perfection and damaging consequences for mistakes. If you were involved in a religion that incorporated messaging around heaven and hell, making mistakes may have been presented as a fast track to damnation. Some religions believe that we are born sinners and our life needs to be spent redeeming ourselves. If this was the messaging you were brought up with then of course each mistake will feel monumental! But, mistakes are a very normal part of the human experience and usually turn into wonderful opportunities for growth!

 

5) Difficulty in Forming Trusting Relationships

It can be difficult to trust individuals after leaving religion as the people that were supposed to keep you safe may be the perpetrators of trauma. It is normal to feel guarded and unsure of who to trust after leaving a religious environment. As you begin to discover your own values and beliefs it will become easier to find individuals that you feel you can trust.

 

6) Difficulty Feeling Safe in Your Body

Purity culture permeates many religions. Individuals are taught what choices they should and should not be making with their bodies and face intense consequences when making a “wrong” choice. Many times women specifically are taught that their bodies belong to their husbands, God or men in general. This messaging separates individuals from their bodies, eliminates choice in sexual scenarios and can lead to sexual trauma. You deserve to feel safe in your body! Let’s say that one more time…You DESERVE to feel safe in your body! Reconnecting with yourself can be a difficult process and may bring up strong emotions, but with the support of a mental health professional in a safe environment reconnecting with yourself is possible.

 

Healing Is Possible

Healing from religious trauma is a personal and often non-linear journey. It requires patience, self-compassion, and a safe space to explore painful experiences. It is important to give yourself grace in the process and know that even the smallest step towards growth makes a big impact on your journey. If you or someone you know is struggling with religious trauma, consider seeking support from a mental health therapist. Remember, healing is possible, religious trauma IS trauma and you are not alone!